托福写作典型错误解析

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托福写作典型错误解析

1. 不一致(Disagreements)

所谓不一致不光指主谓不一致，它还包括了数的不一致、时态不一致及代词不一致等。

例1. When one have money ，he can do what he want to 。

(人一旦有了钱，他就能想干什么就干什么。)

剖析：one是单数第三人称，因而本句的have应改为has ;同理，want应改为wants。本句是典型的主谓不一致。

改为：Once one has money ，he can do what he wants (to do)

2、 修饰语错位(Misplaced Modifiers)

英语与汉语不同，同一个修饰语置于句子不同的位置，句子的含义可能引起变化。对于这一点中国学生往往没有引起足够的重视，因而造成了不必要的误解。

例1. I believe I can do it well and I will better know the world outside the campus。

剖析：better位置不当，应置于句末。

3、 句子不完整(Sentence Fragments)

在口语中，交际双方可借助手势语气上下文等，不完整的句子完全可以被理解。可是书面语就不同了，句子结构不完整会令意思表达不清，这种情况常常发生在主句写完以后，笔者又想加些补充说明时发生。

例1. There are many ways to know the society. For example by TV ，radio ，newspaper and so on 。

剖析：本句后半部分“for example by TV ，radio ，newspaper and so on 。”不是一个完整的句子，仅为一些不连贯的词语，不能独立成句。

改为：There are many ways to know society ，for example ，by TV ，radio ，and newspaper。

4、 悬垂修饰语(Dangling Modifiers)

所谓悬垂修饰语是指句首的短语与后面句子的逻辑关系混乱不清。例如：

At the age of ten， my grandfather died. 这句中“at the age of ten”只点出十岁时，但没有说明“ 谁”十岁时。按一般推理不可能是my grandfather，如果我们把这个悬垂修饰语改明确一点，全句就不那么费解了。

改为：

When I was ten， my grandfather died。

例1. To do well in college， good grades are essential。

剖析：句中不定式短语 “to do well in college” 的逻辑主语不清楚。

改为：

To do well in college， a student needs good grades。

5、词性误用(Misuse of Parts of Speech)

“词性误用”常表现为：介词当动词用;形容词当副词用;名词当动词用等。

例1. None can negative the importance of money。

剖析：negative 系形容词，误作动词。

改为：

None can deny the importance of money。

6、指代不清(Ambiguous Reference of Pronouns)

指代不清主要讲的是代词与被指代的人或物关系不清，或者先后所用的代词不一致。试看下面这一句：

Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted her to be her bridesmaid。

(玛丽和我姐姐很要好，因为她要她做她的伴娘。)读完上面这一句话，读者无法明确地判断两位姑娘中谁将结婚，谁将当伴娘。如果我们把易于引起误解的代词的所指对象加以明确，意思就一目了然了。这个句子可改为：

Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted my sister to be her bridesmaid。

例1. And we can also know the society by serving it yourself。

剖析：句中人称代词we 和反身代词yourself指代不一致。

改为：

We can also know society by serving it ourselves。

7、不间断句子(Run-on Sentences)

什么叫run-on sentence?请看下面的例句。

例1. There are many ways we get to know the outside world。

剖析：这个句子包含了两层完整的意思：“There are many ways。” 以及“We get to know the outside world。”。简单地把它们连在一起就不妥当了。

改为：

There are many ways for us to learn about the outside world. 或：

There are many ways through which we can become acquainted with the outside world。

8、措词毛病(Troubles in Diction)

Diction 是指在特定的句子中如何适当地选用词语的问题，囿于教学时间紧迫，教师平时在这方面花的时间往往极其有限，影响了学生在写作中没有养成良好的推敲，斟酌的习惯。他们往往随心所欲，拿来就用。所以作文中用词不当的错误比比皆是。

例1. The increasing use of chemical obstacles in agriculture also makes pollution。

(农业方面化学物质使用的不断增加也造成了污染。)剖析：显然，考生把obstacles“障碍”，“障碍物”误作substance“物质”了。另外“the increasing use (不断增加的使用)” 应改为“abusive use (滥用)”。

改为：

The abusive use of chemical substances in agriculture also causes/leads to pollution。

9、累赘(Redundancy)

言以简洁为贵。写句子没有一个多余的词;写段落没有一个无必要的句子。能用单词的不用词组;能用词组的不用从句或句子。如：

In spite of the fact that he is lazy， I like him。

本句的“the fact that he is lazy”系同谓语从句，我们按照上述“能用词组的不用从句”

可以改为：In spite of his laziness， I like him。

例1. For the people who are diligent and kind， money is just the thing to be used to buy the thing they need。

剖析：整个句子可以大大简化。

改为：

Diligent， caring people use money only to buy what they need。

10、不连贯(Incoherence)

不连贯是指一个句子前言不对后语，或是结构上不畅通。这也是考生常犯的毛病。

例1. The fresh water， it is the most important things of the earth。

剖析：The fresh water 与逗号后的it 不连贯。It 与things 在数方面不一致。

改为：

Fresh water is the most important thing in the world。

托福写作常见的病句解析

1. I am not good at maths, but English

改进: I am good not at mathematics but at English/ My strength is not mathematics but English.

2. Who is the proper person to make up his minds about children’s leisure time?

改进: Who is the proper person to plan children’s leisure time?

3.It is children who clear about their interests.

改进: It is children who are clear about their own interests.

4. I agree the latter idea.(漏掉介词是大家在托福写作中低分的常见病句。)

改进: I agree with the latter idea.

5. Many people dissatisfy with the status quo.

改进: Many people are dissatisfied with the status quo.

6. So I feel breathe more comfortably now.

改进: So I feel more comfortable now when I breathe.

7. People should learn knowledge no matter how old they are.(语义重复也是大家在托福写作中导致低分的主要原因)

改进：People should learn no matter how old they are/ People are never too old to learn.

8. No one knows all the things.

改进: No one knows everything.

9. I want to live in a quiet place to admire peaceful life.

改进: I want to live in a quiet place to enjoy peaceful life.

10. Each form of shavings friends has its advantages.

改进: Each way of choosing friends has its advantages.

11. I was admitted to a Key University for which few dared to sign up.

改进: I was admitted to a Key University to which few dared to apply.

12. Luckily, he recognized an American professor.

改进: Luckily, he knew an American professor.

13. They will learn the bad habits.

改进: They will develop bad habits.

14. In this continued process, people make progress.

改进: In this cycle, people make progress.

15. Lastly, higher education is equal to higher salary.

改进: Lastly, higher education means higher salary.

16. By making friends who are different from ourselves, we can make up for deficiency.

改进: By making friends who are different from ourselves, we can make up for our shortcomings.

17. A wrong decision will bring even worse fact.

改进: A wrong decision will bring even worse result.

18. You spend all your life to fulfill your willing.

改进: You devote all your life to the fulfillment of your dream.

19. Children should be taught disciplines in groups to avoid unnecessary lost.

改进: Children should be taught discipline in groups to avoid unnecessary loss.

20. I felt alone.

21. Eating outside has the most advantage that we can go at any time when we finish eating without doing any washing.

改进: The best part of eating out is that we can leave everything behind after meal.

22. Smoking can help you relax your mind.

改进: Cigarettes can help you relax.

23. What’s about nonsmokers?

改进: What about nonsmokers?

24. Why not to be a non-smoker?

改进: Why not be a non-smoker?

25. Everyone will have many friends in his life.

改进: Everyone has friends in his life.

托福写作范文：learn about people by clothes

托福写作考试有个题目，叫做：You can learn about people by clothes they wear!

根据GRE阅读强化和新概念四册文章的架构，按照上面托福考试的题目，写了下面这篇文章，供大家参考。

文笔拙劣，不揣浅薄，望各位朋友斧正、指教!主要是抛砖引玉，给大家提供一个托福和GRE写作结构的思考方向。

此外，阅读文章可以从写作的角度去思考、学习，写作的文章则反其道而行之，会有新的启发。

Sages have been chattering all the time about the danger and devastation of judging a book by its cover. Admittedly, there is some truth in their effort, as it would be unsophisticated and misleading to calculate one’s moral character and dignity solely by his “cover”, be it his look, stature or even the quality of clothing.A closer study of the issue, aided by an acute sense of customs and convictions, however, reveals quite indisputably that one can learn, more or less, about people by the clothes they dress. The most significant information thus gathered is personal identity and cultural inclinations.

Coming first to indicate the affinity between the people and their clothing is the identity issue, which serves as a solid, identifiable evidence to my argument. With different styles of dressing, one intends to articulate his own identity, thus conveying some cultural subtleties, say, his likes and dislikes, his convictions and taboos. The example of Hippies and Yuppies comes readily to one’s mind. Their unconventional, rebellious dressing code, in a non-verbal manner, remained their counter-cultural manifesto. It is also true in the case of politicians and business people, whose clothing undoubtedly helps to differentiate them from those with different pursuits and occupations.

With one’s dress, a sensitive, well-informed mind could also gather crucial information about the customs, beliefs and other cultural inclinations of the community the person lives in, though, in some cases，the knowledge thus gained might be insufficient, but certainly not dismissible. As we are invariably conditioned by our customs upon the very moment of our birth, we grow up to be little creatures of our communities and convictions. Their beliefs are our belief, their impossibilities our impossibilities. Quite understandably, personal clothes, as an important ingredient of its cultural ambience, definitely speak with a tangible, visible language. The only difference is whether the “reader” is aware of this cultural cue or not. But it is forever out there: substantthing. Instead, a perceptive and reasonable mind forever knows how to explore more, but always by starting with proper knowledge and orientation from what they dress!